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Ladies and Gentlemen,

Today is an indeed sad day for this Nation. We gather here to lay to rest the greatest artiste of our times, in fact, I daresay the greatest artist and musician the world has ever known, Vic. O. Let me talk a bit about his hitherto most popular work,After Party.

After party (From the album I promise to love 4ever) began yop yop yop yop yop and went ahead to assure us that everybody ‘after party’ but I could have sworn he was saying everybody ‘havta parry’. Wharever. What I found especially genius in this video that broke the world record for the most expensive music video ever made, (competing against other acts like Kwality and Queen of Vaginas), was the friend on his right who was so into this party – that took place on a couch against a wall, and comprised of two bottles, an unnameable object and a few glasses – that unable to contain himself and driven by the excitement of this upbeat party, the great music showcasing strong lyrical content, he dropped the phone he’d been making a dummy call on, jumped up and moved about enthusiastically, just like the guy who showed up later on the far right of the screen who was also seriously chuffed.

In direct contrast, the girlfriend sitting on Vic.O’s left and cradling a teddy bear with her black eye and lip pencil was so taken by the sex appeal oozing from Vic.O’s newly bleached and pockmarked face that she, near immobile and lethargic, wrapped herself around him, completely enthralled. What was not to love?

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Oh By the way, when i thought this was the worse that could happen, I found out he’s from my mother’s village. Shebi next thing I will not hear we are related…